Podcast #24 Mindset Matters

FULL UNEDITED TRANSCRIPT:

Mia LaMotte  0:02  

Hello. Hello, welcome Murshidah. How are you today?

Murshidah  0:12  

I'm awesome. Thanks for having me. I'm really excited to be here with you.

Mia LaMotte  0:17  

I'm excited that you're here. And the fact that it's super late where you are. And you said, Yes, I'm gonna do this anyway.

Murshidah  0:23  

Right? Yeah, I wouldn't miss it. It's like 1010 30 at night right now. Yeah, so it's fine.

Mia LaMotte  0:32  

Yeah, I will be so. So, tell, tell the audience a little bit about who you are, what you do, and how we met.

Murshidah  0:43  

How we met. Let's start with that first. Okay, we met in a program called divine living Academy. And after that, we went into Queen program with Gina Devi. And that was how I kind of like I saw you. I was, I remember that when I first met you, Mia. I was one of those people was like, I'd rather keep quiet and not I just listen in and, and not bring too much attention to myself. Because I was like, so all of this amazing people. You know, I feel I that time when I first I think it was back in 2017 or 2018. When I first joined the program, and I saw you you have visible you were talking and I was like I was really admiring you and you kind of were like, was very visible to me at that time. It took me some time before i i Break that that fear and went online and asked a question live to Gina. And that was all because of the internal work that I did. And I remembered you you I don't know if you remember me at that time, but I remember you. But I was very, very silent. When I first joined. I remember. So we met Andy by leaving we met again at Queen because he was a higher end program coaching program. And yeah, I made it I made the money and got to the higher end program.

Mia LaMotte  2:02  

Yeah. And I'm so glad that you were so vulnerable and talked about that, because I had to experience that when I first got into the program, like I had never done anything online before. And so there were so many other women who it was easier for them to get visible online, it was easier for them to do the work. And I too felt that same way. I felt like there were other people who were more visible than I was right. And so I'm glad that you talked about that. Because I think that a lot of us, we just automatically assume that other people are capable of doing things that they're really not comfortable doing.

Murshidah  2:36  

Exactly, exactly. And that's the same thing I hear about people they're up right now people telling me oh Murshidah you're so confident on camera, you know, I could never be like you enter like a like a couple of years ago, I was like so scared of the camera. Not not not television camera. I've had experience in that. But the laptop camera. Isn't that weird? It's like, all these things that we put in our head. And we believe that

Mia LaMotte  3:02  

it is. And it's almost like when you're talking into the camera on the computer, it's going into this abyss, right? Because you're on the world wide web and you have no idea who's going to be watching you what they're going to be thinking. And a lot of that does mess with

Murshidah  3:16  

your head. It does, it does. And it's very interesting until we get out of it. And it's like putting in new beliefs and new mantras, for example. That's where we have a different set of mindset and a vision. That's, you know, that's totally more positive than before.

Mia LaMotte  3:34  

Yeah, so speaking of mantras, what is one of your mantras? All

Murshidah  3:38  

right? Well, my mantra is very over over time, but the most recent one is that I attract and I radiate abundance. I attract and I read it abundance. And I wake up every morning with that, and money comes in.

Mia LaMotte  3:56  

Right on me.

Murshidah  3:58  

It goes in good things come in, you know, when I say money, it's not just about business money, it comes in lots of i term money as as things that are good that I can use as a tool to do and carry my purpose. So it could be opportunities. It could be a connection, it could be a lead, so that is to me. Abundance, you know and money. Yeah,

Mia LaMotte  4:23  

absolutely. So tell me, you mentioned business. For the listeners out there, like what do you do for business?

Murshidah  4:30  

My business is I have two businesses. One is corporate training. And that is a company that is operating out of Singapore. I'm Singaporean, currently living in Kuala Lumpur. So my business called Love and Respect transforms holding in Kuala Lumpur is a business where it's an online platform where I coach and mentor business owners, entrepreneurs professionals, to create a social impact through their business. So I coach them to get at least five to 20,000 US dollars within 90 days of them Going up, starting starting a business from scratch, or if they're already running a business to incorporate social impact and create that five to 20k within 90 days. Yeah. Nice.

Mia LaMotte  5:11  

And then what is the other business that you're doing with

Murshidah  5:14  

the corporate training business? The corporate training business is again, all things love and respect in organizations. So I I train executives, government offices, GLC, government, linked corporations, and even NGOs, nonprofits, on how to incorporate love and respect values in their whole organization through customer service, through creating products, through team bonding, through even image and grooming and how they present themselves through the to the corporate brand as well.

Mia LaMotte  5:52  

Yeah, yeah, I love this. And you and I actually had a conversation about like, what does the all this even mean? And I didn't even know that you were trained image consultant at the time that we were having this conversation. So we're both trained image consultants, but we don't we don't teach the principles as we learned that we're teaching them in a different kind of way. Let's talk about like, what do you mean by social impact? And also like, is this this? Is this the idea of like conscious leadership?

Murshidah  6:21  

Yes, absolutely. conscious leadership is, well being conscious in, in how you lead others. It is I also talk about feminine leadership, using your feminine energy to lead others not just masculine, which we were very used to train people on our lead people, you know, directional goal setting, you know, beating your competitors, feminine leadership, or conscious leadership is about creating good for your team for yourself, as well as your environment, your the people around you, your communities, and, and that when I talk about communities, it's not just a specific group of people, but humanity as a whole. So it is for people and planet. So when I talk about social impacts, I do use the United Nations SDG goals. So you know, the sustainable development goals as a model with my clients, and also myself, or where is that interest of impact that you want to focus on whether it's gender equality, women empowerment, life on Earth life under the, in the water, you know, it is, it is for the animals for the environment, and eliminating poverty, Zero Hunger in the world. So whatever your interest is, it's through your business, that you are creating a solution to one of the main problems that we already have in the world, including, you know, climate, the climate crisis right now. So this is this what I mean by social impact. So the businesses that I coach have, you know, the, the business owners that I coach have a good heart already, they, they know that they want to solve a persistent problem, like they see injustice somewhere, they see gender inequality, or, or there's lack of diversity in organizations and they want to, they want to do want to have more diversity in their own organization, hiring people from, you know, places or you know, they were normally people wouldn't hire you know, whether they are visually impaired or whether they are refugees or they're low income or lacking a certain certification or whatever. The people that I coach and the people that I work with, and including my own business, we're focused on at least one of these one of these goals. So yeah, like for me, it's like I work with refugees here in Kuala Lumpur and also the low income homeless, the low income like sex workers as well for them to come out of poverty and actually those who want to create an alternate a different way of earning income like you know, the sex workers that I coach are normally people who said like they don't want to go and stay in the street they want to do something else but they don't know how and they don't know how to how to come out of that brand of this you know, so we work also with them so it is a one hit one model every training I do a paid training and and membership into my organization contributes to the training of mindset and skill set of these groups of people that I work with.

Mia LaMotte  9:26  

Oh my god, I love that idea. I never thought about like I've done scholarships to people before but I've never really thought about like the do one give one because I love TOMS shoes. They do that with you know and now you're doing it with your coaching. I love that.

Murshidah  9:43  

Absolutely. And you know what, Mia? Actually TOMS Shoes inspired me. I saw that and I was like, I want to do that because before I was doing, you know charity on the site like a family activity. That's what we do. Instead of taking My daughter's that up to the mall. We said, you know, we don't want her to just, you know, think of all weekend, let's go to the mall. So we took her to orphanages, we took her to feed the homeless, we created projects where she can bring her friends and do something good. And that was how we started. But it was never part of my business at all. It was separate. And then I saw TOMS Shoes. So I said it was possible, how do I incorporate that. And then also, I, because we were doing a lot of homeless street feeding for about at least three years, you know, feeding the homeless, we knew some of them personally. And we knew some of them had had children from the time they were pregnant until the time that they had kids, they were still in that state, they were not coming out of poverty, and we're still happily feeding them giving them stuff and we feel good. But we don't see them come out of poverty. And we're not helping them seriously. So that was when I said how can we incorporate this. And when I saw TOMS Shoes model I said like, let's see how we can explore that one held one model and we've turned that successfully. Now business, I love

Mia LaMotte  11:03  

this idea, I'm gonna have to research it. And we'll we'll talk offline a little bit about it. So I can see how I can make that happen, too. I love this. Because I think one of the things that you kind of touched upon, and we're not going to spend a lot of time on this, but the whole idea of sex work, right, and the whole idea of people who are in poverty or who in who don't have homes or places to live, and how we believe, right? That somehow they're like, morally wrong or bad people because they're in these situations. And really the issue is more with the the system, and how we're just kind of like putting a bandaid on it and not really actually addressing the problems. Right. So tell me a little bit about how like you decided that you were going to help like this population of people, but also like, how do you actually help them move from the the mindset, I'm assuming is what would you guys work on the mindset of a person who is homeless? Or who feels like they can only do sex work to make money? Like how do you get them out of that mindset, and, you know, shifted a lot,

Murshidah  12:09  

a lot of coaching, a lot of counseling, and also a lot of supportive community, and the community that they know the people who experience the life that they did, and then managed to come out of that. So that I found was very, very powerful. What I did was I facilitated but I brought in people who used to be like them, you know, like, even with refugees, I had refugees who are now you know, TEDx speakers, and appearing on on mainstream media, like Al Jazeera, CNN, Channel News, Asia, and they're talking about the refugee situation here in Malaysia. And they all started being one of those people who are facing all of this oppression and are being detained and, you know, having to go to jail just because they were working. And it was illegal to work. So all of this they so they managed to find their voice and, and help others. So when they see an example of somebody who, who managed to get out of it, they can relate that. So what I do is right now I work with leaders or people who have that, that that illustrate, I interviewed them first. And people were like, really, yes, I am. That's it, I'm done, I will do whatever it takes. And then we hold them accountable for that and lead them. And so that process is also challenging. So that's why I don't I don't take too many now I take maximum five in a year for me to coach them personally. And I make them leaders. So as the leader in their own communities and setting them as an example, more people see like it is possible it is it is possible to come out, it is possible to make that three to $5,000 a month, it is possible to be able to create a positive life, even though they started all started with nothing. And they come from very traumatic environments. So I started to focus on leaders before I was just, you know, randomly talking to people and putting it, you know, in a seminar form, and we have 100 people in a room. And I found that the impact was not that was not that effective. Not many, not even one or maybe maybe one person out of 100. So that was not not much impact. For me it was it was not good enough, until I started to coach and identify specific people make them leaders in their own communities. And that's when I saw they started creating impact in their own communities, because people can relate to them better and more people helped and more people come out of that. That never negative cycle of poverty. Yeah, I

Mia LaMotte  14:43  

love this because one of the things that I'm noticing too, when when I'm talking to people who need help from us, right from coaches, it's usually people who are underprivileged that need the most help, right? They're going to need the most help, but they can definitely have the most impact in can we release, because they don't really take the thing that they've been doing. And the things that they're learning, don't take it for granted. Like, like, I know I have in the past. You know, I definitely come from a place of privilege. And I'm not saying that I don't. But there's also, like parts of me that I understand this whole thing about injustice, I understand what it means, like what it means to have to depend on someone else in order to move forward or to change laws or to do things like that. So I'm glad that you are addressing this and tell me, how did you how did you come to the conclusion that I'm going to do this one on one coaching with people like this, instead of like talking to all of these leaders in the room? Because I think that concentrating your effort, right? And then and then having them kind of go out? And do the thing makes so much sense to me now that you said it that way? Yeah, because we tried it.

Murshidah  15:54  

The other way. We tried it, we were like, oh, let's help people as possible, we want to save everyone. And you know, we push put them we got busloads of people picking them up from the streets and Senate. Hotel, and we did seminars, and they all came, they didn't learn anything they were there to eat. And they were they were there to make friends or just to share their problems is just for friendship, but it was not making a change, or they didn't see the need to make a change. It's all about Oh, poor me, okay, at least now I can enjoy myself. And they keep asking me for money. So it was it was not something that the direction that I was looking at, but it took me about three steps to doing I, my husband and I, we were like actively doing this. And even to the point where my husband get calls, like at night from friends who own restaurants and said, Okay, we have a job opening, you know, this person left, and we have like about five of the available slots for waiters or cleaners and we have a house for them. So my husband will go to the street and actually talk to groups of homeless, who wants a job, and actually put them in a hotel. So that the next day, they can go to work and he'll arrange all the transport. And at that time, because we didn't work on the mindset, yet, we thought that the solution is they don't have a home, let's give them a place to stay immediately, they don't have a job or money, let's give them a job straight away. And what happened with that was a lot of them a lot of hotels actually called us and said, you know, they wanted the money from the deposit, and they didn't want to say they were like, you know, threatening the receptionist for money and all that. So we will all know, again, is the mindset and the belief, you know, so we had to redo all that. And it was a lot of trial and error, I didn't have an example to follow because there is the people who are actually helping here, NGOs, you know, the nonprofits, and that was not the direction they were giving a lot giving and we love them, we love that they are helping so many but we there was no change, and we were being intrapreneurs we want to see something, let's try something different, you know, and so there was a lot of trial and error.

Mia LaMotte  17:59  

Yeah. Yeah, and it sounds like I mean, I've learned this too and it's probably we both have learned the same way right by the doing but by the undoing of all the things that we've learned previously. And that mindset is just so important to really create change because I see that you guys coach for change, right? But if we're not working on the mindset of we're just handing out the band aids instead of actually cutting people open and doing the surgery and taking out the stuff that doesn't work anymore. I find that the mindset is like the biggest piece and and so many people miss that

Murshidah  18:44  

that is the fundamental one you know, the basic one is the mindset and just like I learned that with the entrepreneurs you know sometimes we work with okay social impact, this is how you create what is your passion, but if we don't first work on the mindset, nothing changes the self belief the the Money Story, the money mindset, all of these things come in the resilience, the confidence. So, mindset is very important. So even with the refugees that we work with, in all it is all about First we do the forgiveness the releasing before we start to program okay, this is what you can do. It is all about the mindset first and even even people from you know, like the sex workers or the marginalized communities or the low income it is that sell belief that they are not meant to be a certain level that even though they say yes, I want to make money but it's just that that sell belief. It all comes from mindset. So we work on that is the first fundamental things and until we see that, okay, they're open to receiving and they can start to take action on small things, you know, like creating certain projects and they're doing and receiving money, okay, let's go bigger and all that. So that's how I also work with my business owners and entrepreneurs who want to create social And also with a marginalized community mindset first.

Mia LaMotte  20:04  

And that's the same thing I do as well, like, a lot of people will come into my program because it is personal branding, but they really don't understand that, hey, everything starts with your mindset. And even at each level, like you and I were talking about, like how we were working with Gina at a higher level, we still have to work on mindset, every day, every everybody that I know who is successful, or who is an entrepreneur, or who's doing things that that create an impact in their lives and the lives of others, they're working on their mindset.

Murshidah  20:37  

Absolutely. And every time we want to bring a certain level of self belief, you know, like I mentioned, we've got like going from zero to $1,000. In business, it is a big shift to receive that just $1,000. And then from 1000, to $5,000 is another Mindset, five to 10k 10 to 50k is all that you know, and as we grow our business as we are creating bigger impact, it's all our mindset and self belief also on the ability to, to really creating big change and receiving big money. Yeah.

Mia LaMotte  21:11  

How do you see how do you help people with the self belief part? Right?

Murshidah  21:18  

Okay, so what we do is, again, we always focus on what are their strengths, instead of focusing on things that they cannot do? So what is their superpower? So what is their talent? How can we how can we turn that into, into money making rather than doing things that you're not good at, don't don't try to do something like for me, okay, like Kajabi, for example. I have, I don't even know my password. And my husband is so fun, this is so fantastic. So he does all that all of those stuff. And it is it's so pleasurable to do work, that you and you only focus on what you're good at, and work with people on things that you you're not good at and let let yourself be supported. So that's one of the key things like focus on your own strengths. And that's where the SEL believe, you know, you are good at that. And you know that it is, it does not take so much resistance and, and, and fear, because you're so good at it. For example, I'll give you read example, also on some refugees that I work with, and they come to Malaysia, they can speak English, they cannot speak Malay, they only speak Arabic. And it's like, single mom, only 500 ringgit, if I'm hearing it, it's like slightly less than at least 400 US dollars in their wallet for them to survive. And I say don't worry, you know, I started with only touring it, you got 500 You're better off than me. So what are you good at? And they were like, Oh, I can pull? Look, I say, Okay, let's try what you can cook. And when they cook, they just share certain dishes, I just, you know, give them some money, go to the go to the market, just create sample dishes and all that what they can cook. And it's like, restaurant quality dishes, you know? And it's like, that's their superpower is that can you do more of this? You know? And you're like, Yeah, but I need help, like, how much to price? And maybe, you know, like, who will want to want to eat this? And I'm like, Yeah, as long as you can focus on the cooking, let's see who can market and we have a group of people who can just share online, you know, showing us eating food, so delicious. And that's like that was how one Palestinian lady she learned. She learned to speak basic Malay and she's better in English. She started from scratch. And she has children to support she came to Malaysia with no skill never worked before. And she learned how to cook. She learned how to cook. She was not even like, she couldn't even cook. But she learned how to cook. And she found that was her superpower. She could create dishes like all kinds of dishes. And now she's making I think she's making more than some of the local, a local here, you know, with a catering catering services, and she does Palestinian dishes, like whatever she can remember her mom used to just experimented at home. And that's her superpower. And that was like, she became very confident in that. Yeah, so speaking to people about it. Yeah,

Mia LaMotte  24:13  

yeah, you have said a mouthful. So doing like forming out the things that are not your zone of genius, right? Letting other people do that, and, and just doing the thing that you're really good at, right? A lot of us believe that we have to know how to do everything. And that we have to be good at everything. And therefore we're just scattered. Our focus is scattered, our skills are scattered, and we do get this. Like I know like I said when we first started like working in, in divine living Academy, like I didn't know what I mean, I've been on Instagram but I didn't know how to make an Instagram post, let alone make one about myself or you know, promote my stuff. And so even just that little bit of a not having that knowledge, but thinking that I needed to know how to do all of these things in order to be successful. It, it takes the focus out, but it also like took me out of the game. Right? So I'm glad that you're teaching like your your newer entrepreneurs, like right away, like stop trying to focus on all the stuff that you don't know how to do. Let's focus on what you do know how to do, and then we'll figure out the rest.

Murshidah  25:22  

Yes, exactly. I'll get people who can support you on those things that you know, you need support from?

Mia LaMotte  25:29  

Yeah, absolutely. All right, so I'm gonna ask you some of the questions that I asked some of my, my other participants because we kind of just wired into a bunch of different stuff, right? So what would you what would have three words that would best describe you and, and or your business,

Murshidah  25:46  

um, high energy, love, and joy.

Mia LaMotte  25:53  

Speak to me a little bit about joy and why that's

Murshidah  25:55  

important. Okay. Joy is something Okay, Joy brings up this high vibe, positive energy. When you have joy, you receive things a lot better, you you become more confident, you enjoy whatever it is, even even when you are facing something difficult. When you have you are joyful, in that you are grateful that the challenge is there, that puts you in a total different mindset. So I always talk about even when you're creating social impact, focus on the solutions you are providing, because it can be very depressing when you look at all the problems and challenges, right? And be joyful, that you are creating solutions. And it's exciting. And there are people who want and they're looking for, for you to to solve that problem. And it is an it is something that that is fun. And this is this is something I always instill in my community as well. So in our in our business, we focus a lot on joy, because without joy, you you'll be stressed out. Absolutely not fun.

Mia LaMotte  27:05  

I'm glad you brought a joy because we're going to I have a joy coach that that's going to be coming on and talking about. Wow. Yeah, yeah. So you'll get to meet her. Um, alright, so what is your least favorite mode of communication? The phone talking to people on the phone,

Murshidah  27:23  

or you know, people on the phone, and which is very ironic, because now I'm very active on clubhouse. And I have my rooms then I just had a room open just before talking to you. And it's because I'm not a very auditory person. I'm a very visual person. I like to see people and even if we have to communicate online, I always ask, Can we meet on Zoom? Right? Yeah. So that's that's the reason why but I have learned to learn to be more auditory listen better, and, and be able to communicate better as well. But it's not. It's not my favorite thing.

Mia LaMotte  27:57  

Yeah, I'm, I'm like that with him else. I cannot. I send videos, and I'll respond in a video. That's so much easier for me than typing it out and trying to my mailbox is full, it stays full, and I can't stand it. Tell me what, like what, where that makes you feel like a total badass.

Murshidah  28:20  

Oh, um, interestingly, when you ask when you are selling me this question, I was thinking of what makes me feel better. As I say, you know, I love long flowy dresses, that I feel so confident in long flowy dresses. And I wear that even in like corporate meetings, you know, if I, if I have to present to a group of corporate says, Well, I don't wear a pantsuit because I just don't feel that's me. I love wearing dresses. So that's what I wear. Yeah, I still I still get the job. So I guess, I guess it has an effect.

Mia LaMotte  28:57  

And I'm glad that you you're speaking about this, because I think a lot of us believe that we have to show up in a certain way in order to get the respect in order to get the job in order to do the thing that we're there for. And really it is about like, what makes you feel amazing. Yeah. And using that energy in the room, instead of instead of wearing what somebody else told you. You should wear?

Murshidah  29:23  

Yes, yes, yes, yes. Yes. Yes.

Mia LaMotte  29:26  

Yes. So tell me a little bit more about, like what our listeners can do today to have more impact in the world through their businesses. And then how can people get in touch with you?

Murshidah  29:39  

Okay, oh, one one key thing is so what problems are you solving? If it's something that's very passionate, it's in your heart that you find that you know, you have gone through it, you found you found that it was a challenge, whether it is you know, communicating with people or dressing up or being authentic or whatever it is in your area? To focus on that, and that that is something that you can you can start on first. And why were you Why do you find it was a challenge? And how do you overcome that, so that that can create a solution to a problem that you want to solve that you can solve? And also, what is your passion project? Like if you could, if you could do something that can solve a problem that you see in your community? Whether it is you some people saying, you know, there are a lot of stray cats in my area, and it's, and it's disturbing that people just, you know, they abandoned cats, or they're, they call the, you know, the call this land authority where they come and they, they take the stray cats away, and they actually put them to sleep, you know, yeah, and all of these things, and I've got people in my community also, because they feel so much for animals, they're animal lovers, we, we work their business to find her animal shelter, as well. So whatever that interests you, and no judgement, if it's whether it's something that you feel passionate about, for example, climate change, or whether it is like you see women's rights issues. So focus on that, that that gives that gives you something that you desire, that you desire to solve a problem, because something that really interests you, and you feel strongly about that will get you to continue doing it. If it's something like, Oh, it's a good idea. Yeah, people say that we should do something for the environment, maybe I can do that. I think if it's if you hear yourself talking about that, then it's not for you. So find a social impact that really you resonate with, and you feel like, I want to do this, even if it means no money, I really want to do this. So that's that's how that's how you can start first.

Mia LaMotte  31:54  

So what what do you have coming up? Do you have anything coming up any programs or anything you want to talk about? Yeah, okay.

Murshidahh  32:01  

We have a lot of programs coming up this month, this is October October's ending. We have a conscious committee, we call the conscious communication month. And we're having a program, end of October on conscious communication and how to be an accelerated learning speaker. Yeah, to be a conscious community conscious communicator. And when we talk about Conscious Communication, it is not about just how to structure your words, presentation and all that it is about being conscious of what you, you feel when with certain words, you can feel it in your body. So it's a trigger, and how do you manage that? And how do you relate that to the best way to the person that you are talking to? So this is conscious communication. And we also have weekly meetups and huddles in my communities so they can can get in touch with me and I can put them into our community where we do have our huddles, and then you're welcome to join in and meet some of the other social impact. Business owners as well. Yeah.

Mia LaMotte  33:07  

Awesome. Awesome. So how do people get in touch with you if they want to learn more about what you have coming up or want to work with you?

Murshidah  33:15  

Um, Instagram, LinkedIn, just Google my name murshid aside, I think you can, you can see a whole lot of things. I'm on LinkedIn, I'm active on LinkedIn. I'm also active in Facebook Murshidah, dot site, and also Instagram, where she does say, yeah, yeah, these are the places that I'm very active in. Okay. And we'll

Mia LaMotte  33:34  

put the links to your social media and the notes for this show, so people can get in touch with you.

Murshidah  33:42  

Yes. Yeah. That's great. Thank you so much.

Mia LaMotte  33:46  

Oh, my God, this is so much fun. And I cannot wait until you guys get to hear what we talked about today. And like, go out and make your own impact. Like what is the thing that you want the thing that you know, that needs to change in the world, and you be that person to make that change? Absolutely. Thank you for having me. Mia, you

Transcribed by https://otter.ai